Given that behavior at its core is communication, we best approach unexpected behaviors not with judgment or criticism, but a patient curiosity. However, most of us are operating from the same level of curiosity and/or judgment that was afforded to us. To nurture good neighbors, we must help our youth learn how to communicate and cope with their needs in healthy ways.

It’s inevitable that our communities operate with a “hidden curriculum,” or invisible codes of conduct that are used for punishment that nurtures mistrust. To nurture good neighbors, the village must work together to clarify our expectations not for harm and punishment but for developing trust, predictability, and healthy rhythms of life.

We are better together, not apart. The creation of healthy neighborhoods starts with today’s collaborative families, educators, and organizations. Some of the most effective change we will make requires authentic village collaboration. No one should be going it alone. Trying to uplift your village’s youth alone is a recipe for burnout, and adult self-care in the absence of community care is futile.